Widowed Without A Manual

Some of us grieve longer then others. I will not be rushed out of my love, that still inhabits my heart.

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In this dead cold night
winds rush past my skin
leaving it white and cold
but as cold as my skin seems
is not as cold as my heart
season of joy they say
season of birth decorated with white beards and red suits
bells ringing to attract money
money is the key focus of this season
there is no joy of truths
only traffic and debt and over indulgence
my heart is cold
for it is void of love
memories are fading
soon they will not keep me warm and safe
from the merchants of ‘happy’
december 24 2016

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Why

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Photo on 2012-11-17 at 08.59

Why are so many able to move on
To put the past to rest
To look forward without tear filled eyes
Why do I still see you each night
I feel the hurt more each day
For with every day I know its real
You are gone, dead
Nothing can bring you back
I drive and remember you
Like a movie being played
My memory clicks on and there we go
Every word, every movement your body makes
I remember
a beautiful large silver band
To remind you, that I love you
To tell everyone that I am still yours
My love has not faded
I don’t want this love to go away
Why should I have to move on?
We spend so many years fine tuning our love
So now they want me to discard it?
I will not stop loving you
I will not move on
I just don’t want to

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