Manic Highs

Oh dear, yesterday I had another of those manic highs! While your in them you feel fantastic.

You think clearly, at least you think you do.

Your mind races, ideas flow without effort.

You connect with friends.

You speak of the future with such incredible conviction. All of this is gone the next day, today. I think I like the lows better.  They only effect me. When these highs come there seems to be no controlling them. It’s not like going down a snow hill uncontrollably its more like being attached to a helium ballon and enjoying the thin air. Not having any concerns to the increasing space between me and the ground below. Believing that all will be well and when and if I let go of the string I will only bounce like a beach ball till I stop.

I really should know better. If only we were given a warning like ears ringing before it happens.  I think one of the  attractions to this is that we immediately want to contact friends. Like this is the opportunity to show them that we are fine. Perhaps that is one of the reasons for the highs? To periodically let them know we are ok so we will be left to grieve. They accept them willingly. They breath a sigh of relief. They can then continue on thinking all is well for another month.  Oh dear,,,, another month.

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