Yesterday I worked very hard to concentrate. I had a sculpture that needed shipping. It was so difficult to get the simplest number lined up in my mind. Deep breaths did not rush extra oxygen to my brain to get it to sharpen. Why does our mind float so easily in the dense cloud? I only seem to be able to do the barest of things to survive. When with company I do get in my roll, as if an actor A reflex that I hardly notice anymore. But….. when I drive off my smile slowly drops till it is the opposite. I rest the lines, they follow suit.
Last night my eyes and breath and arms legs shoulders neck all got so heavy and tired. I laid my head down. I looked over to the little screen but within moments I was turning off and I slept over half a day, seventeen hours plus I must say. I could have stayed longer for I felt no life to rise. I wish so I may sleep till my heart recovers.